Grace

In order to be happy in life ("free") be a genuine optimist. This includes my attending "real" college, which my mom herself never did, where I can listen to self-rightous professors drone on in the pervaiding anti-God theories of the moment, which they readily embrace, out of their own personal denial. So then I can graduate probably by this time with an STD (I was encouraged to test the water out first) and slave for a lifetime to pay off my pesky student loans as I attempt to discover value in the shallowness of my next-to-useless degree, which if I'm lucky, I can use to move nowhere and change nothing, more help furthur perpetuate the vicious cycle of money, greed, fashism, and triviality, not to forget sprinkled with a smidge of completely overwhelming godless materialism.
Then as I get my boring and useless job, so I can join the rat race, I will live in an empty world of constant perpetual anxiety, working for an untidy group of little fashists. As I endeavor to find contentment in my possessions I am violently thrown into a deep pit of credit card debt, but mainly due in part to my ongoing plastic surgery, but I of course need and deserve it, so my Cosmo says.
Eventually I will die due to my over emphasis of the Atkins diet, recommended and highly hinted at by my unloving husband, however this caused my eventual heart failure, but in my death I will escape the unhappy marriage I once entered thinking I could flee from some of the unmerciful pressures of my self-centered life, ...and as I'm on my way strait to hell, well at least I can remember that I never once had to look into the face of poverty, I merely took a constant gaze into the empty mirror which was my life and hid behind some lostsense of drugs, alcohol, and my semi-fancy suburb life.
And this was me, the future of America, and in this "great" nation it is almost best fitting as a college student before I begin this crazy trip called life, that I drop acid as to furthur ignore the truth, why not? is it not fashionable?) -simply put, hehe. Certainly this life as a result of taking my mothers advice is one filled with the love and freedom. How can it not be, after her extensive study and embrace of eastern religion -China is loving and free right?

Written by my good friend Minnette Bunnell (used with her permission)